Today marks four weeks... and, though last week I only got in two days of running, I am still feeling pretty confident about my ability to stay with my plan. I got up a little later this morning (my mom was staying at my house so I could swing getting out of the house after hubbie left for work), and I remembered why I have been getting up so early. It is hot outside! Once the sun comes up, running becomes a swampass-inducing affair. Having an aversion to sweating is admittedly silly, especially since I live in the Deep South and sweating goes with the territory of exercising; but I would like to avoid sweating and stinking as much as possible. If that requires waking up before dawn, I'm in.
I am beginning to feel ready to embark on a creative endeavor that requires some level of commitment. Last November, I attempted NaNoWriMo, but that effort fell flat... went over like a lead balloon, as my mother always likes to say. In fairness to myself, I'm pretty sure that men chose the month of November for NaNoWriMo. I truly wanted to do it, but I found myself very busy preparing things for the holidays (I cook and serve Thanksgiving dinner for my family each year). As in every other month, I also had to manage my parents' medical appointments, and -- considering the fact that for most of their lives my parents have treated their bodies like toilets -- there are many appointments. It really isn't that time consuming, but they do seem to happen in clusters that make getting any kind of routine down seem impossible. Excuses, excuses, excuses, I know! No writer in the history of writing hasn't had interruptions aplenty. That is life, and just as with exercising I must find my way over, under or around the obstacles life inevitably presents. I think I busy myself with tiny, inconsequential details so I can convince myself I don't have time. If I don't have time, I can't try. If I can't try, I can't fail. What I need to do, and soon, is to take a leap of faith -- a bold step in the direction of my passion. Of course, just as with exercising, I need to select a small goal I feel comfortable with, one that will challenge but still allow some room for success.
One problem I have observed with my current system of exercise is I sleep in on days I don't go running; and, as we all know, sleeping in begets more sleeping in (please note, that when I say sleeping in I mean I wake up at 6:45 shortly before my daughter wakes up, which leaves me just enough time to get dressed and brush my teeth). I am pondering a solution that involves an early wake up time everyday. On days that I don't go running, I can work on a novel. Can I share something? Just writing the words "I can work on a novel" made me nervous. Stating it publicly is a bit frightening and certainly made my heart skip a beat. Perhaps, I should restate... on the days that I don't go running, I will work on my novel.
I feel I owe it to myself to embark on this creative journey. Though I began three separate novels, I never followed through. I don't know what happened but it got very real for me, and I abandoned the projects after a week or two of effort. I allowed myself to get swallowed up by both the drama and the mundane details of my life. If I can manage three days of running, I can manage three days of planning/writing my novel. That is the commitment I am pledging at this time, knowing fully the possibility of failure exists. There will be bugs, oh yes, but I have faith in God and myself that they will be overcome.
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